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Wednesday, June 22, 2011

After the dust settles...

Writing requires inspiration and I haven't been inspired until today to write. Primarily because I've been really busy setting up house/home with my CEB, and that, was a lot more work than preparing for the wedding day! And then there was the adjustment period after the wedding too, which was very tough emotionally - who does what, where does this or that belong, what does each prefer, and of course, trying to understand and accept each other's very different behavior and needs.

Thankfully, my CEB has been easy to love because of his relatively easy-going nature, wit and sense of humor. Like when we were out shopping for household stuff the Monday after our wedding.

My CEB "I am a knight"
The Slog "Huh?"
My CEB "I have a cloak, shield and sword like a knight what!"
The Slog "What are you talking about - wait...are you using the food cover I just bought as your shield and your Mr Man Brolly as a sword?"
My CEB "Yah, and your floor rubber-mat over my arm is my cloak so I am a real knight!"
The Slog ?@#@$%@!????
So yeah, other than having great day to day company in my CEB, my CEB is made for wonderful cuddling and snuggling up to in the night. What adds the icing to the cake is when he sometimes surprises me with the stuff that he says or does. It isn't that I have low expectations of him. It is just that we are pretty direct with each other about what we want/require, and we usually try to deliver what the other party wants...or talk about it to reach a mutually acceptable solution when there is a problem in delivering.

Therefore, I was touched when my CEB surprised me a week ago with 2 fridge magnets that he had procured most discreetly from a colleague. I didn't expect my CEB to remember, much less bother about the conversation we had when I said it was such a pity that I didn't ask him to buy the Hard Rock Cafe magnets when he was in Copenhagen 2 months back so that I could add to my recent collection of Hard Rock Cafe Fridge Magnets. Other than being a "Bag of Nonsense" (as my friend named him), he can be a "Bag of Surprises" too!

Like how he surprised me today when I came back to find him not just home earlier than I expected, but also very helpful around the house - he actually ironed all the clothes in the basket after along day at work. Actually, surprised wouldn't be the right term - amazed is more like it because my CEB is usually far too tired by the time he comes back each evening to do any housework. On the other hand, because of my somewhat more flexible working life, I am happy to do the brunt of the chores...except cooking!

Because other than cooking instant noodles and using a microwave to warm up processed food, I have absolutely no idea how to cook. I never had to learn, having my good ole mama as a housewife the past 10 years and talented house-help before she stayed home. My CEB had been duly warned about my limitations before the wedding and thankfully, he loves cooking. Home-cooked meals by my CEB are the best meals to me. :D

I don't feel different after marriage, and neither does our relationship (except for the thorny adjustment phrase) but subtle things do change inevitably. For eg, I now appreciate the use of handcream which I never did prior to us moving out on our own, and when we quarrel, I can't say to my CEB what I used to when I am extremely unhappy with how or what he says to me "Eh, I am not your mum I don't have to love you unconditionally mind!"

The thing about being married is that - it's for the long haul, or at least with that intention. :D

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