Daisypath Anniversary tickers

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Sunday, June 26, 2011

First Wedding Monthiversary

Our first wedding "monthiversary" was remarkable in the sense that we spent almost the whole day with the people who had supported us on our journey to the altar. (It must be true then that when you marry someone, you don't just marry that person, you marry that person's family!). And with just half an hour more to go to the next day, and my CEB snuggled in bed next to me doing his thing - thumbing his iphone -, I can think of no better way to end the day than with a post to remember us being married for a month.

I use the word "remember" instead of celebrate because there isn't a sense of triumph in passing the one month mark. Yes, we had adjustment issues, yes we had more spats than when we were dating, and yes we gave each other s*it, sometimes unknowingly and sometimes knowingly but the issue was never whether we would get through married life but how best to.

The most common question I've gotten the past month is "How's married life?" From friends, relatives, singles, married folks. I've give them answers like "It's tough, challenging, my hands are rougher than before from all the housework" but really, married life is so much more than all of that.

How do I tell them that married life means being able to experience the simple joy of watching the man I love sleep (as my CEB has done now), his lips upturned in a smile, his arm resting against mine, his gentle breathing a warm gust of air against my elbow, and knowing that this same man is going to wake up in the morning, reach out for me in bed to hug and kiss me on the lips before going out to earn a decent day's living to provide for us?

How do I tell them about the laughter that my married life is filled with almost every day? From the truly witty to the truly corny? Like, remember I mentioned here that my CEB wanted both buaya toys to join us in our new home? We brought them over with the first stuffed toy I gave him - an adorable lamb - and one morning I came into the bedroom to find that my bored CEB had proudly arranged the poor creatures in an absolutely compromising position - the perpetually half-lidded melancholic expression of my large nua nua buaya toy making the whole scene even more ridiculously funny.


And how do I tell them that married life also means squabbling about household chores with my CEB, our voices getting louder until one person gives (unfortunately that usually is me), and how it also means having to get on my hands and knees to scrub the freaking bath-tub or the yard area when I spilled bleach accidentally all over it?

Where do I even begin telling them that married life is doing things I never would have done before - reading a food steamer manual, a novita garment steaming manual, hand-washing some of my own clothes, and...surfing the internet to find out how to cook dou miao because that is 1 of the few veg my CEB eats?

And would they want to hear too that married life sometimes means having someone privy to your most embarrassing moments, not just the involuntary snores or farts or even weight gain (horrors!), but those times that you mess up so stupidly you wished no one else but you knew - like wearing a G-string the wrong way around because a label is usually found on the back of a pair of panties, and having your partner find out and guffaw outloud?

And, married life also means more responsibilities and sacrifices that a single me would never have to make/consider:

My CEB "Can you come back once your SA trip is over? Going to miss you."
(I'm leaving this Wed evening for fishing till Sat morning, and then flying off to South Africa at 2am on Sun morning ie Sat night)
Me "Har, really? Thought you don't treasure our time together from the way you arrange things on Sat which is supposed to be our day together?"

In the most pitiful tone he could muster, my CEB said mournfully "Poor me. I won't have sandwiches for breakfast anymore from Thurs"


Me "Hah! Knew it - not miss me but miss someone making you breakfast!"
My CEB (quite unashamedly) "Yar lor - what is your husband going to eat when you are gone?"
Me: *Bo Chap Look but secretly happy that my CEB likes the sandwiches I make for him.

And so there goes one month of us being man and wife :D

My CEB, if you are reading this, I want you to know (if I don't tell you often enough or show it) that I'm thankful that you have made me the one person you have vowed before God, family and friends to share your life with, and I treasure each day we have been blessed to share together in matrimony.

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