Day 2 in Langkawi on 4 November 2010 - (Oriental Village, Langkawi Cable Car and The Datai Resort)

I'd raved about the Langkawi Cable Car and Sky Bridge attraction when I was there in Feb this year (click here) and needless to say, that was the first place my CEB and I visited the next day after breakfast. I've written enough about the Langkawi Cable Car which is located within the Oriental Village so I'll just review the latter. The Slog Reviews: 5/10 as a tourist attraction. Although there are many shops within the compound, a large majority of them sell nothing but overpriced touristy stuff (think fridge magnets, cheap clothing, mineral water). Despite its cheerful appearance (see pic below), I wouldn't advise anyone to waste more than a couple of hours of one's precious holiday time in Langkawi walking about the Oriental Village.

Unlike my previous visit, the sky was overcast (see pic below) because it was the monsoon season and I was disappointed that my CEB did not manage to catch the amazing blend of the bright blue sky and the sparkling blue sea. However, we had a really great time together climbing down to and up from the sky bridge (as I might have said before, one should put on a good pair of track shoes and be in decent physical shape as the climb up may be challenging). We also climbed the steps to the two highest points of the Cable Car attraction, which unfortunately offered pretty much the same view as from the sky bridge. Asit was rather cloudy, we sat and waited for about half an hour to see if the wind would blow the clouds further out. And true enough, the sky cleared....somewhat...for us to take a photo.One thing I should mention though is that although this attraction is a must-go at least once when one is in Langkawi, one needs to note that one is not allowed to carry one's bottled waters past the entrance turnstiles. The only reason I can think of for this strange rule (given how hot the weather is at Langkawi and a cable car isn't really an aircraft) is that the attraction's owners are seeking to hold tourists hostage to the ridiculously priced drinks sold at the various stations near the top. And talk about being held hostage brings me to the next part of my entry - a review of our stay at The Datai, Langkawi (click here for the hotel's homepage). We had read some really good reviews of the hotel which is currently rated as the #2 hotel in Langkawi on Tripadvisor and since the price of a deluxe room at The Datai is about the same as that for a room at our local six star hotel Capella where I'd stayed last year, I had moderately high expectations for our stay at The Datai and it certainly measured up. Right from the moment we parked our rented Nissan Latio and walked to the lobby (see pic above), we were ushered to seats overlooking the adults only pool, given two cool face towels and served cool juices in those tall glasses complete with a flower. No standing in line at the reception or even having to stand at a counter to register. The staff took our passports and credit card from us to process at a separate section while we enjoyed the view and the drinks. After registration was complete, a friendly staff took us to our room in the West Wing. The staff also showed us the facilities in the room and told us abt the various popular activities that The Datai offers - the culinary cooking class (at RM180 per pax) and the complimentary morning and evening guided walks through the rainforest that surrounds The Datai. A very useful print out of the Things to Do in Langkawi can be found in one of the table drawers. Here are a couple of pics of our room.

In the cupboard near the left of the windows is the mini-bar and in the cupboard near the right is the safe. We had a rainforest view and were advised by the staff to keep the windows shut at all times so that the monkeys in the rainforest would not be able to get into the room and wreck havoc! The balcony outside the windows was clean but the thought of monkeys and mosquitoes quite detered me from sitting there to enjoy the sounds and sight of the rainforest. The toilet was extremely spacious with a rain shower area, a WC area and a large bathtub. Separate sinks for him and her, as well as separate wardrobes behind each sink. Very nice! What I liked more than anything else though about The Datai (including the complimentary juices and soft drinks available in the mini bar) was the quality of toiletries provided - Molton Brown shampoo, condition, bath gel and body lotion! We went for a stroll at The Datai's private (stretch of) beach and I have to say that the hotel puts a great deal of effort keeping its beach clean! No litter at all, and lots of beach chairs strategically placed for one to enjoy a view of the ocean/hear the sounds of the waves crashing on the beach. The children/family pool is located at the beach level and seems rather basic and unimpressive for a hotel like The Datai (see pic below) - I would have expected at least a waterslide. Maybe The Datai's target crowd isn't families with young kids. One can either call for a buggy at the lobby to take one to the beach or walk the 10min way down several flight of stairs (not recommended for the elderly and weak) and through the rain-forest. The same options apply for getting back to the hotel. For us, we took the buggy to the beach as it was still drizzling and walked back up the path to the hotel. The walk took us through the rainforest and past some of the villas, the Datai's spa and a little creek. Thankfully we didn't spot any monkeys (the Datai area seems to be teaming with them). The Slog Reviews of The Datai: 9.5/10 for luxury and comfort but 5/10 for location esp if one is into visiting attractions and popular restaurants. Definitely rent a car from the airport or even town, if one is going to stay at the Datai given its location and exorbitant car rental prices (RM280 for a 24hr rental of a Myvi from the hotel). As for internet connection, there is free wifi throughout the hotel but the signal at our room was really weak and we kept geting disconnected. The American buffet breakfast for one person at The Datai is RM96++ and so we decided to put our rental car to good use and have our daily breakfast at The Loaf instead. The Loaf which opens at 8am daily has a breakfast menu and a breakfast set is approximately RM30+ per pax. However, one also has the option of selecting the bread items that one wants from the wide spread available. And that is what we did. The friendly staff at The Loaf who recognised us from last night's dinner, cut the various pieces of bread nicely and served them on a plate to us. My CEB was aghast though that all that bread cost RM30 but well, as I said in my earlier entry, at The Loaf, one pays a price for the ambiance and service.

Day 1 in Langkawi on 3 November 2010 (Penang Airport, flying in from Penang, Car Rental and The Loaf)

I never thought I would return to Langkawi again this year after having been there in Feb this year for 4 days. The tickets which we had purchased for this trip were for Penang but my CEB suggested going to Langkawi for a few days because the advert for Eagle Square at Langkawi on the back of one of our local buses had caught his eye. So just a couple of weeks before the trip, I checked airasia, mas and firefly for the available flights and flight timings and there happened to be some sort of a promo for return tickets (penang-langkawi) on firefly at RM150 per pax (inclusive of taxes) which was pretty reasonable. So here's to my first time boarding a propeller plane.
At Langkawi airport, we headed for the car rental counter which I'd used the last time. The idea was to rent the Mitsubishi Colt again at RM 90 per day for 2 and a 1/2 days (RM225) but we were told that it had already been rented out. Also, they claimed that this was the high season because of the public holiday (Deepavali) and tried to charge us an arm and leg (RM180 per day for a vios). After some hard bargaining (well, bargaining as best as I could in my elementary Malay hah!), we got to drive away a less than one year old Nissan Latio at RM300. What irked me though was that the petrol tank was almost empty and our first stop had to be a petrol kiosk. After filling up, we went for dinner at The Loaf (see my previous entry here) as we were in a rather celebratory mood (the 3rd of Nov (or thereabouts) marks our 4th month together). My CEB was in the mood for beef and he ordered the medium rare beef flank (RM52):

The Slog Reviews: 7/10. My CEB who loves his beef raw enjoyed the meal thoroughly. He said it reminded him of the beef he had in France regularly when he was there for work. However, I who like my beef medium-welldone felt that the beef was far too raw and rubbery for my liking. So I guess whether one feels the RM55 for the dish above is well spent would be highly dependent on how one likes one's beef. Oh, and the two buns on the plate are the complimentary starters (bread) that The Loaf serves.

As for myself, I ordered what I had the last time - the smoked salmon twist (RM34) in soy sauce. I'd reviewed it as 9/10 before and the dish this time round didn't disappoint in terms of presentation or taste.

We also ordered a couple of cheesecakes from the considerable variety available for our dessert. The Slog Reviews: 7/10. The cheesecakes are too sweet and even the nutty one tastes like rock sugar instead of nuts. Only for those who love sinfully rich cakes.

My CEB who was seeing The Loaf through a fresh pair of eyes liked the place considerably for its ambiance. There is of course, a price to pay for the ambiance but I would recommend the restaurant if one is looking to have a nice dinner in Langkawi. Not a perfectly romantic place but decent enough if one is with a date. There is a selection of wine available at the restaurant and the service staff are courteous and able to communicate fluently in English. There are many other restarants located at Telega Harbor at Pantai Kok but all of them appeared to be bereth of guests as opposed to The Loaf. So if one has just time for one dinner at Telega Harbor, and one wants to be safe than sorry, this is the place to eat. Click here for the full menu.

Death Mask by Graham Masterton

I've just completed yet another horror novel, and by one of my favourite authors, Graham Masteron. I've never forgotten his first novel, Tengu, which I read in my teens (oh dear, and where did time go?) and reading Death Mask made me recall how good Graham is at writing novels with lots of random senseless violence.

The Slog Reviews: 9/10. Death Mask is about a woman who is sodemised against her will with a vodka bottle by a man who takes a fancy to her at a conference. The man who appears to be remoseless about what he has done to her, sends her flowers every week with a note referring to what he had done to her. One day, she kills him by slashing him to death in an elevator with a knife and then sticks the knife into the gap between the elevator doors so as to inflict deep slash wounds on herself. She tells the police that a red faced man with slits for eyes was the assailant and the police engage a sketch artist to draw a pic of the so called assailant based on the description. Little do they know that the sketch artist is experiening a phenomenon where things she draws come to life because of a ring by Van Gogh hung on a necklace around her neck that she bought from some flea market. So when she draws the picture of the assailant, the picture does come to life, borne of the spirit of the sodomised woman's vengeance and commits mass murder of men, women and children all around the city using two choppers. The sketch artist eventually manages to put an end to this unnatural creature by drawing (and therefore bringing to life) a picture of her late father in law who was a superb detective. A horror novel that is a good bedtime read.

Day 3 at Langkawi - Before the flight back to Penang - thots on the blackberry

5.26am now and I can't sleep on our last night (or should I say morning) here in Langkawi. Our flight back to Penang is about 9am and we have to return the rented car by 830am at the airport. The alarm on my blackberry is set for 615am so I guess I have all of the next 45mins to write this before my CEB wakes.

This time I am writing here using my sony ericsson w950 webbrowser function because his netbook has run out of power. And unlike in Bangkok where entering an entry was a breeze because I had been using this phone exclusively, I am having problems with the cursor button and keypad functions because of my recent intensive use of the blackberry. Speaking of which my CEB has mentioned more than a couple of times during the past couple of days tt he is going to ask my boss to take the blackberry back because I am giving it more attention than him. Ok I kinda made tt last bit up but I think tt tt is the real reason, and not as he claims, tt he does not want to see me working on a holiday.

That being said I have to admit tt carrying around 3 mobile devices this holiday has been quite a hassle but I can't load my blog/ blogger or take nice pics on my blackberry and I can't access my office email through my sony ericsson. The other phone, a nokia is used for the prepaid sim card which is an infinitely cheaper option to msg or make calls with when in Msia/Thailand.

I suppose for future holidays what I could do is to divert all incoming calls and sms to the blackberry since under the plan the co bought, all incoming calls are free. And then I'll use the prepaid sim card on the sony ericsson to call/msg back. This would mean just carrying 2 phones like I do now in SG. Okay, now that I've typed this out and sorted out the arrangement I feel more at ease.

Time to start packing for the flight back to Penang.

Lure Fishing at Boon Mar and Bait Fishing at BSR (again)

When I went to Bangkok (BKK) last year with my mum, we enjoyed ourselves so much that we decided to repeat the experience again this year. So off we went on a Wed night till late Sun night end Oct for a "Mother-Daughter fishing, eating, shopping cum beauty" trip. Boosted my experience lure fishing in Langkawi (which I will be flying off to tomorrow!), I decided to go to Boon Mar pond which stocks exclusively, barramundis (Barras), also known as Sea Bass or Kim Bak Lor (Kims). Boon Mar is located 80km east of Bangkok in the Bangpakong district of the Chachoengsao province and we took about 40mins to get there from a hotel near the airport area. The air there is amazingly fresh given the country side location of the pond but the amenities provided at Boon Mar are horrifyingly basic. It might therefore not be a good idea to bring non anglers or ladies to Boon Mar - the toilet is located in a shack which is a good 10 mins walk (on a dirt path) from the fishing pond and the only shade/shelter at the ponds is a couple of umbrellas on rickety stands. Fortunately it didn't rain (or shine too brightly) and neither mum nor I had to use the toilet at all. I started out with a yellow bright surface minnow lure. After two or three casts, I got my first hook up at Boon Mar, a 2+kg Kim 

The next 4-5 cast netted nothing and the wind was blowing rather strongly which meant that the lure did not land where I had aimed. So I changed to a heavier lure, also a surface one with the all too familiar red and white body. Cast, retrieve, cast retrieve, and then TUG! Next fish on put up a bit more fight but given its size, it was no match against The Slog or rather, a 3olb leader hehe. Pic below of the second Kim. Because I knew that the pond was full of nothing but Barras (Kims), the only one variable which I could play with (without changing line poundage or reel) was the type of lure I used. So I decided to change lure every two barras. After the third barra on the red and white surface action lure, I changed to a green diving action lure with slow motion retrieve. I didn't have much faith in this lure at first but green is my favourite (and lucky) color so I figured why not. And it turned out that I never changed any more lures after using this one. I landed the second biggest Kim of this trip on the first cast. And then it was Kim and more Kim. It got to the point where I didn't mind failing to land two kims becaused they had tossed the hook. Kims put up a pretty good fight when snagged...that is what makes barras good fighting fishes. Unlike Pacus which jerk and try to break the line, groupers which dart down to make for its holes, and stupid catfishes which make long runs (for structures etc), Kims actually surface from the water shaking their entire body to dislodge the hook from their mouths. However, even if one failed to set the hook properly (which I have never forgotten to do since I lost that fishing competition in KK last year), a greedy Kim which takes the entire lure like this one below, is a goner. Talk about deep throat.

Anyway, between 9am to 11.30am, I landed 12 Kims, lost about 4 and got pretty bored/tired of fishing Kims. Variety is really the spice of life. Pic below shows the final and largest Kim I caught at Boon Mar estimated to be about 4-5Kg. Oh yes, one more important thing about going to Boon Mar - wear covered sandals. See my sandals above? Those are NOT good for going to Boon Mar with. I got at least 4 huge insect bites, 2 of which caused my right big toe to swell up and make walking difficult. After I sprayed insect repellant, I still got 3 huge mosquito bites. I don't know how true it is that certain blood types are more prone to mosquito bites but it seems that I get more bites that my CEB every time, and this time, more than my mum too!

Well, as I said, it got really boring hooking up Kim after Kim and I decided to go to Bungsamran (BSR) in the afternoon after lunch to relive last year's thrill of reeling in large mekong catfishes. Sadly and unfortunately, after having landed a 35kg catfish last year, nothing I caught this trip compared or gave me the same buzz. There is no way one can use light tackle at BSR because some of the catfishes there are over 100kg and you never know which fish may take your line (the minimum/standard reel is 6000 unless you are prepared to run the risk of your expensive/treasured reel breaking if you catch a large one). On hindsight, maybe I should have just gone for even lighter tackle at Boon Mar to up the thrill of catching Kims but oh well. Pic below shows No 6 of the 6 catfishes I caught at BSR in the space of almost 3 hours. And I think it is time to hit the gym again - didn't have the stamina I had last year...meh.

After fishing, mum and I went for dinner at the Thai restaurant on the second floor of Ploenchit Shopping Center. The food there is pretty steep for BKK standards but the crispy fish and prawn ball appetisers are superb. However, although I wouldn't say this is a Must-Eat-At restaurant in BKK, it sure beats the other alternatives at the basement of the shopping center.

And oh yes, even if BKK is no longer good for pond fishing (at least for me), there is always good food and one should try out the immensely popular local Jap restaurant. Zen is higher end than Fuji but Fuji is so reasonably priced with a huge variety of Jap food that it is worth a visit at least once when one is in Thailand. We had Fuji twice when we were in Phuket, my CEB and me, and this time in BKK, I had Fuji twice too. Below is a pic of just some of the many food items on Fuji's menu.

Blackberry Bold 9700 Smartphone

"Christmas came early for me this year huh"...that was the first thing I said to my beloved boss when I got this yesterday because of her (requested for on an urgent basis at that). The next thing was "Thank you" of course!

Having a smartphone with unlimited data usage along with a company line would have come in really useful last year when I was shuttling between China,HKG and SG for the China project, and also working insane hours at times. I remember having to borrow my colleagues' blackberry(s) to make urgent phone calls back to my boss most of the time. That, or present my private phone bill to be reimbursed, both of which was a inconvenience and hassle. Not to mention having to check my work mail from home most nights just to be ready for the next day. However, I assumed that I wasn't given a phone or company line last year (despite the promotion in July then) because of my level (even legal counsels have grades/ranks in a company) - afterall, my colleagues on the project were all deputy directors at least (hence, the entitlement to a phone).

So when I got the phone yesterday I assumed it was due to the promotion this year to my current grade but when I tried to add some colleagues of the same grade, I could not find them. A call confirmed that the grade/rank isn't what determines whether one is given a smart phone, company line and data plan.

This can only mean one thing. Put together with all the other nuggets of information/hints dropped along the way, I am pretty sure of it. And this holiday-filled, happy-go-where-I-please life of mine looks like it may well come to an end. Oh well, Merci Boss (if you are reading this) - you have my word (now written even!) that I am your woman to the end. Nothing but my 110% for the projects we are going to do together!

The Cell (2000) movie

Last night, we went back to ou hotel rather early and I caught The Cell on HBO. I wanted to catch The Cell 2 also (which was scheduled to show right after The Cell) but my eyes just wouldn;t stay open. I suppose it was because I was too wiped out because I woke up at 7am for fishing.

The Slog Reviews: 8.5/10. I absolutely loved this movie - the stunning visual effects are will etch themselves in your memory for some time to come, esp the 1 of which showed a horse being bisected vertically into many sections. The plot is about the exploration of the mind of a twisted serial killer, where he is both the evil king and an innocent abused young boy in his mind's realm. If you have watched the movie silent hill, the surrealism of this movie is comparable. And oh yes, the make up for lopez was incredible. The way her face was made up when she was playing different roles made her look like two diff pp. Esp when she played the evil persona. A good movie all in all

1 of the best hairstylist /hairdreser in Bangkok

must be, IMHO, Khun Phonatip (Nickname: Neang) And his number is +66894292257.

Although he has a website, all the info there is highly inaccurate save for his contact number(s). Neang is highly mobile and when I sms-ed him this trip to confirm the appointment, he had moved from Cut and Curl (where he was last Nov) to Salon & Spa at Ruem Rudee Road (near Conrad Hotel).

Be warned though that you need to pay the price if you want the Monkey (and not peanuts), and Neang not only does not come cheap,but he also doesn't lower the price he quotes. He might throw in a free trim (not a haircut) and that's about all. The prices in short, are comparable, if not at best 10% cheaper than that of Monsoons in Singapore.

However, if one is in Bangkok and in need of some hair therapy, do look for Neang. His ability to converse in English, suggest haircuts and do a most satisfactory job of one's crowning glory/mane more than justify his fees.

Jonah Hex (2010) Movie

Another movie that my CEB and I caught at Philea Resort on his netbook was Jonah Hex. My CEB fell asleep on my shoulder 15 mins into the movie but one shouldn't read too much into that given that my CEB was driving this road trip (for a change) and he had been up since 7am.

I managed to complete at least 67% of the movie on my own before the netbook's battery went flat and the movie was good enough that after we got back from dinner, I asked to borrow the netbook to watch the ending. However, my CEB fell asleep (yes, yet again!!!!) and his deep, regular breathing against my shoulder made watching the movie to the end a struggle. But I am glad I did because who doesn't like to see the good guys triumph, an occurence which sadly doesn't happen very often in real life.

The Slog Reviews: 7/10. I can't do any better than the summary written on Wikipedia on this movie. The movie isn't a must-watch, the movie isn't outstanding but it is enjoyable as an action film and one gets to feast one's eyes on the delectable Megan Fox. And as I said, the good guys win in the end and save the world. What's there to hate about the movie? :)

The Last AirBender (2010)

I'm seriously short of this commodity called time. I haven't had time to watch a movie or a DVD the past few weeks and I only managed to get The Last AirBender on my CEB's netbook on Saturday afternoon when we were at Philea Resort while he was napping.

The Slog Reviews: 6/10. The movie is obviously part of a series, given its ending but I wouldn't be in too quick a hurry to catch the sequels if those are anything like this movie. The actors and actresses are mostly unknowns (actresses and actors) and there is nothing novel or deep about the storyline or plot. While the graphics may be mildly interesting, one can enjoy the graphics on a TV screen just as well.

Hotel Courtyard@heeren

This Sat we'll be going to Melaka again and I haven't had the chance to write about the last trip there save for this entry here. Come to think of it, that was from 25th to 26th September and I remember thinking then, that our next trip to Melaka would be one full month away, but as usual, time has flown by and we will be leaving tomorrow for Melaka yet again. So I thought I should write about the last hotel we stayed in at Melaka before our next stay at a Melaka hotel.

The last 2 times I've been to Melaka the past 2 years, I stayed at Hotel Equatorial and Majestic Hotel. I was so impressed by Majestic Hotel that I went to look it up on TripAdvisor. And it was ranked #2 of all the hotels in Melaka. So that got me curious about the #1 hotel, Courtyard @ Heeren. My CEB was quite agreeable to spend a weekend in Melaka to find out so I proceeded to make the booking for the hotel which was, quite a hassle because I didn't want to give the hotel my credit card's confi details and therefore had to open a paypal account to pay the deposit. However, that being said, I must commend Amar from the hotel for his prompt and helpful email replies throughout the reservation process. The hotel apparently, only allows reservations through its website.

Above is a pic of the front porch of the hotel which is situated along Tan Cheng Lock Road. We used the GPS to get to the road but once there, we had to slow to a crawl so as to be able to find the hotel which is one of the many joined shophouses on the left side of the one-way road. When we found the hotel, we thought we could park at the parallel parking lot in front of the hotel but one of their staff got into the car and directed us to the parking area behind the hotel. If we had just turned left earlier along Tan Cheng Lock Road (at the place with a signboard that says parking area) instead of driving all the way to the front of the hotel, we would have been able to find the parking area ourselves. I guess this is something that the hotel needs to mention to guests who are driving there.

The lobby of the hotel, as seen from the pic above is very diff from any other hotel's lobby I've seen. Guests are served with drinks upon registration at the front desk. As we were early, (12.30pm), we asked if we could check into the room earlier but were told that the room wasn't ready. So we walked to Nancy's Kitchen which is just a stone's throw away from the hotel and had lunch there first. :) The pic below shows the central courtyard at the hotel which seems to be a really peaceful place to have a game of chess or meditate.

Based on the feedback I'd read on TripAdvisor, I specifically requested for a deluxe room on the 2nd floor of the hotel. Apparently it can get quite noisy on the first floor. There are no lifts in the hotel (which has only a first and second floor) but the stairwell and the corridors smelt of lemongrass which was rather pleasant and showed the thought put by the mangement of the hotel. Below is a pic of the room we were given...we peaked into other rooms along the corridor which had their doors opened and it seems that the decor varies from room to room. Ours is quite clearly, bamboo-themed.

A heating flask was provided on the dresser per the pic below but other than that, there were no other in-room facilities like a mini-fridge/bar or a safe.

I didn't really like the design of the bathroom but my CEB thought it was just great. The sliding doors and the bamboos concept = an utter lack of privacy and that, is not always a good thing. My CEB was most miffed at being banished to the lobby everytime I wanted to use the bathroom. Oh, and there is also no lock at all to the bathroom for some strange reason.

The last pic below is of the other end of the bathroom area. The standing shower (there is no bathtub) is built with a glass ceiling and I didn't really like that either but privacy is assured (unless from within the room).

The Slog Reviews:9/10. The location of the hotel is brilliant right at the heart of the action in Jonker Street (and near all the swell eating places at Jonker), the staff service is fantastic and the rooms are spacious, clean, decently priced and a haven from the heat and bustle of Jonker Melaka. Highly recommended to all who visit Melaka. However, if one doth has a bit more to spare and has a car (so as to get back from Jonker Street in the night), the Majestic hotel is still THE best.

Fair Fighting Rules for Couples by Nathan Cobb, Ph.D

Fair Fighting Rules for Couples by Nathan Cobb, Ph.D

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #1: NO DEGRADING LANGUAGE
Avoid name-calling, insults, put-downs or swearing. Putting your partner down or criticizing your partner’s character shows disrespect for his or her dignity. In sports there are many rules that prevent one player from intentionally injuring another. In marriage and relationships, similar rules must apply. When you intentionally injure your partner, it’s like saying, “You are not safe with me. I will do whatever it takes to protect myself or to win.”

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #2: NO BLAMING
It’s pointless to blame each other. Blaming your spouse distracts you from solving the problem at hand. It invites your spouse to be defensive and it escalates the argument.For example, if you leave a visa bill lying on the table for your spouse to see, and the bill later goes missing, you might be tempted to blame each other. You might insist that your spouse is disorganized, must have picked it up and put it somewhere else. Your spouse, in turn, might accuse you of being absent-minded and insist that you just don't remember where you put it. But blaming each other will not accomplish anything. It won't help either of you feel any better. It won't strengthen your relationship at all. And it won't help you find the bill.
In situations like this, make a conscious decision that your relationship is too important to undermine it with blame and judgment. Focus on keeping your goodwill for each other intact and finding solutions to the problem instead of blaming.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #3: NO YELLING
Yelling only escalates things. Chances are nothing will get resolved when your emotions are running so high. If you’re mad and feel like yelling, then it’s time to step away and cool down (see rule #8).Keep in mind that yelling can be subjective. What is yelling to your spouse may not be yelling to you. Perhaps you are not tuned in to how you sound. Or you may have grown up in a home where family members were loud and passionate, and talking loud when you are upset seems normal.Your spouse's experience is the one that counts here, however. If it feels like yelling to your spouse, then you are at least raising your voice, if not yelling. Make a conscious effort to lower your voice. The meaning of your communication lies in how your message is actually landing with others. If you can’t tone it down because you are too upset, then it is probably best to take a time-out.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #4: NO USE OF FORCE
Using physical force or threatening to use force (i.e. a raised fist or a verbal threat) in any way is unacceptable. Develop the self-discipline to set limits on your anger and your behavior before you reach this level. If either of you resort to physical force and violence in your relationship, seek professional help.Use of force includes pushing, shoving, grabbing, hitting, punching, slapping or restraining. It includes punching a hole in a wall, throwing things or breaking something in anger. Acting out your anger in these ways violates the other person’s boundaries and sense of safety. Each of us has a right to be safe and free of abuse or physical danger in our relationships.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #5: NO TALK OF DIVORCE
In the heat of an argument, threatening to leave the relationship is manipulative and hurtful. It creates anxiety about being abandoned and undermines your ability to resolve your issues. It quickly erodes your partner’s confidence in your commitment to the relationship. Trust is not easily restored once it is broken in this way. It makes the problems in your relationship seem much bigger than they need to be.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #6: DEFINE YOURSELF, NOT YOUR SPOUSE
This rule is about being the expert of your own world, not your spouse’s world. Use words that describe how you feel, and what you want and need, not what your partner feels, wants, or believes. It may seem easier to analyze your partner than to analyze yourself, but interpreting your partner’s thoughts, feelings and motives will distract you from identifying your own underlying issues, and will likely invite defensiveness from your spouse. More importantly, telling your spouse what he or she thinks or believes or wants is controlling and presumptuous. It is saying that you know your spouse’s inner world better than your spouse does.
Instead, work on identifying your own unmet needs, feelings, and ways of thinking and describe these needs and feelings to your spouse.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #6: STAY IN THE PRESENT
Stay in the present and resist the temptation to use the situation as an occasion to bring up other issues from the past. It’s discouraging to keep bringing up the past. You can’t change the past. You can only change today. You can look forward to a better future. Try to keep your focus on what can be done today to resolve the issue at hand and go forward from there. If you get off-topic, on to other issues, stop yourselves and agree to get back on track. You can always come back to other issues later.If you do find yourself bringing up issues from the past it is likely because those issues were never resolved in the first place. Things may have happened that you and your spouse never really talked about. Or you may have tried to talk about it in the past but without fighting fair. This rule will be easier to follow, going forward, if you both make a commitment to discuss issues as they happen rather than letting them fester.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #7: TAKE TURNS SPEAKING
Let one person speak at a time. When one speaks, the other should be listening—really listening, not just planning their rebuttal. Take turns speaking and listening so that you both have a chance to say what you need. This goes back to the rules we were taught as kids about respectful playground behavior. Have you ever tried to work through a difficult issue when your spouse was talking over top of you and interrupting you? How did you feel? Consciously remind yourself about this when you feel an overwhelming urge to interrupt or speak your mind.

FAIR FIGHTING RULE #8: WHEN NECESSARY, USE TIME-OUTS
Violating these fair fighting rules is typically a sign that you have already crossed a threshold physiologically, in which signals from the more primitive, emotional centers of your brain have begun to drown out the signals from the more rational parts of your brain. Stress hormones flood your body at this stage. Self-preservation becomes the focus. In this fight-or-flight state, creative problem-solving and mutual cooperation are unlikely. You end up in an escalating argument that becomes more and more hostile and defensive. In fact, it is impossible to have a rational discussion in a climate of hostility and disrespect. This is when its time for rule #8: call a time-out. A time-out is a short break to cool off, calm down and get perspective. Think of it like pushing the pause button on a video. It’s an opportunity to restore calm and be more reflective instead of reactive. Use the time-out to reflect on why you feel the way you do. Think about how to express yourself in a positive way. Try to think about the other person’s feelings and point of view. Think things through before you speak. Then “push play” again and return to each other to resolve the issues calmly.A time-out should be at least a half-hour long (but no longer than twenty-four hours). It takes at least a half-hour for your body’s physiology to return to a normal resting state and for your thoughts to become less hostile or defensive. It’s surprising how different a person’s outlook can be after they’ve had a chance to calm down.

Thistle Hotel in JB

Following my earlier entry about Tune Hotel in JB, I would recommend anyone who has to spend a night in JB, to stay in Thistle Hotel instead. The hotel building used to be under the Hyatt group until a couple of years ago when Thistle took over. So, while the building and rooms are not spanking new, the hotel makes a really affordable AND more importantly, comfortable weekend getaway.

I would add though that there is a rather large difference between the superior rooms and deluxe rooms at Thistle, having stayed at both in the past few months. The price difference though is marginal (SGD 20 max) and one should therefore book the deluxe room (see pic below) where the bathtub is far cleaner (the superior's tub was so grotty we didn't use it) and situated where one can soak and watch TV at the same time. For the superior room, the bathroom is located at a corner of the room instead (ie one cannot see into the bathroom from the bedroom.)

Although the bed looks rather large and provided a really comfy night sleep, we discovered that it comprises of 2 super single beds pushed together which means therefore that the bed sheets must have been custom-made.

The toilet is rather simple but pure luxury compared to Tune Hotel's. Ample clean towels nicely rolled and conveniently placed, tissue paper and toiletries (shower cap, ear buds, toothbrush etc) all provided. Like the toilet I do :)

The best bit about the toilet however is that there is a separate area for showering and a bath tub for soaking and watching TV from the tub. My CEB, as you will note from the picture below, is all about enjoying the view from the hotel room while eating chocolate cake. The Deluxe rooms at Thistle faces Danga Bay, quite unlike the Superior rooms which faces the carpark.

From the hotel room, we could also look down and get a view of the entire swimming pool. Towels are provided at the Hatch Fitness Centre located near the pool and hotel guests can use the facilities at the Fitness Centre which includes a sauna (separate ones for male and females).

The package we had purchased came with breakfast and the buffet breakfast while nothing impressive, was pretty decent (though not decent enough for one to pay the full price seperately for the same if it doesnt come in the package) - Western food (Cereal and the hot items like sausages etc), Malay food (nasi lemak), Chinese food (prawn noodles etc) and the mandatory egg station. The view at the dining area was pretty nice with the full length glass windows overlooking the pool area.

As usual, my CEB, who knows how I like my eggs (sunny sides up!) did his trademark face thingy with the eggs. :) I guess in the end, it is the small things that does matter... :)

The Slog Reviews: 9/10. Thistle Hotel's deluxe room is the best place to stay in JB thus far. Value for money, and not that kind of Tune Hotel's value for money.

Tune Hotel at Danga Bay, JB

This weekend was meant to be one of the few "Stay in Singapore and get things done" weekends but my CEB wanted some quality time together so we reached a compromise. On Sat morn, we stayed in Singapore doing what we had to do till 3pm and then drove in to JB until Sunday afternoon 12.30pm when we made our way back to Singapore to do the rest of the stuff.

Given the short period of time we would be in JB, we decided to try out the budget hotel, Tune Hotel at Danga Bay. This is the second time I've stayed at a Tune hotel, the first being the Tune hotel at Kota Kinabalu where I was pretty fine with the place other than than the fact that the hotel room had no windows, and the corridors were narrow like a prison.

The Slog Reviews: 7/10. We had no problems with the check in and check out. A deposit of RM5 was required for the room key card at check in and refunded promptly during our check out. The counter staff was polite, fluent in English and rather helpful. He gave us a useful $ saving tip which is that we should have bought the aircon svc for 12 hours instead of 24 hours because everytime one leaves the room, the aircon is switched off when you remove the room key card. And there is no way to replace the room key card with another hotel's room key card. I had bought 24hrs cos I figured if we checked in at 4pm, the aircon would be switched off at 4am the next morning but nah, in the end, when we went out for dinner etc, we had more than enough spare aircon time. Anyway, if one runs out of the 12 hours aircon time and requires more, one can purchase the same from the hotel later. As for internet service, there are about 4 computers provided at the lobby for guests' usage free of charge. I wasn't sure how safe the computers were so I didnt go to any sites which required passwords. As for the room itself, I didn't think the room was too small - certainly no smaller than the master bedrooms of the new condos these days. There was a rain shower with hot water. No toiletries at all, no towels, no hot water facilities in the room, no clothes cupboard but hey, there was a window this time. I am not sure why the hotel claims to have a 5 star bed but this is the first hotel where I've stayed at with my CEB where I woke up almost every 2 hours (and woke him up too) ie I had a really bad night sleep unlike the other hotels I've stayed at. It was really bad - I'll check my hp and it would be 2am, then 4.20am then 540am then 7am then 830am...I don't think I'll be going back to Tune Hotel at JB any time soon. There are plenty of hotels in JB which are just as reasonably priced and worth trying out I think.

Yut Kee in Kuala Lumpur

So in my earlier post about Sheraton Imperial KL hotel, I said I would write about Yut Kee, a gem that I stumbled upon while in search for lunch. According to some websites and the owner, this coffeeshop has been around for more than 80 years and was handed down through the generations. The signboard in the pic below is of the menu and prices of the items displayed prominently on one of the coffeeshop's wall, and below the menu are framed newspaper articles about the place.
Yut Kee caught my attention because of the small crowd of people standing outside the coffeeshop waiting for a seat at about 1.30pm that Sat afternoon. Curious, I joined in the crowd and was most pleased when the owner's son, the chap in blue on the extreme right of the pic below, called out to me and asked me how many pp I had in my party. Well, I told him that there was just me, and he alloted me a seat immediately at a table with 2 other couples. Thumbs up for a great first impression! Unlike some owners of other famous/popular eating places (eg this Bak Kut Teh place in KK called Yu Kee), Yut Kee's owners make an effort to take care of their customers' primary need - securing a seat/table at their popular coffeeshop based on a first come first serve/no of pp in the party system.

Now, I had no clue what to order and asked one of the servers for recommendations. He suggested having the slices of the roast pork roll with apple sauce which apparently is available only on certain days of the week. Below is a pic of the table where the pork roll was placed, sliced and either served on the green plates or packed for customers in the white styrofoam boxes.

This is how my meal of roast pork looked like. The Slog Reviews: 8.5/10. The skin of the pork roll was extremely crunchy (but not burnt at all) and contrasted nicely with the soft tender mix of meat and fats. The potatos were rather unremarkable and so was the veg. If one must try the pork roll, just order the pork roll slices on its own without the sides. I didnt like the apple sauce though which was rather too cold and sweet for my liking. That being said, I liked the roast pork enough to order a helping for takeaway for my CEB (who hadn't arrived in KL yet). My CEB who ate the roast pork about 2hrs later (which meant that it was cold), didn't rave about it so I guess this is one of those dishes which should be eaten at the restaurant instead of packed home.

The server also recommended to me, the Roti Babi dish which cost RM7.50. (The restaurant forgot my order so I had to remind them...or they probably thought a gal shouldn't be eating two main courses. Hah). This is how it looked like when served - very unimpressive.

But my oh my, the roti babi tasted freaking fantastic, even when eaten 2 hours later according to my CEB. The Slog Reviews: 10/10. I've never eaten a roti babi before but the incredible light soft fluffiness of the bread totally blew me away - from the moment I sliced in to when I put it in my mouth where it blended and melted away...totally heavenly! The stuffing which comprised of sliced sausages, minced crab meat etc was a delicious mix which proved neither too salty, or hard but was a perfect complement to the bread. Definitely a must-have!

I noticed many people had ordered this dish below which looks like fried noodles in dark sauce, including both couples at my table. The owner's son told me that the shop would be open for breakfast as early as 7.30am on Sun and I said I would drop by for breakfast to order this dish but unfortunately, because of Jogoya, my CEB vetoed the idea. I guess I will just have to wait for the next time I get to KL then :)

Here are the necessary details to help you get to Yut Kee

33, Jalan Dang Wangi
Tel: 03-2698 8108
Opens from 8am – 5pm daily
Closed on Mondays and last Sunday of each month

Jogoya Buffet in KL

After Jogoya, I swore I wouldn't have another buffet meal. However, this vow was not meant to last as my friends wanted to have a dinner buffet at Suki Coca Restaurant on Fri night.